Never Give Up On Your Dream Of Becoming a Mother
by Natalie Evans
Mother’s Day — which is supposed to be a happy holiday to celebrate and honor our mothers — is sometimes a hard day for all who pray to be a mother themselves. I never thought this day would ever be hard. I endured Valentine’s Day with tears for years being single. When my husband and I married, I never expected to have fertility problems and to have yet another holiday to make me feel so alone again.
There are no words for how hopeless infertility can be with no guarantee you will be a parent in the end. Everywhere I would go everything reminded me that we didn’t have children. Friends that married the same year we did started their families, with one child, then another, then another…and still none for us.
Church was another dreaded place to go, leaving me feeling as though I didn’t fit in being one of the few without children. Parenthood felt like a club I wasn’t invited to, and people would say hurtful things, not knowing that it hurt someone wanting a child so badly. My husband and I found ways to keep us distracted. We started our own tradition of going shooting instead of facing the Mother’s Day holiday at church. Even though my husband didn’t always understand my sadness, he understood what I needed to help me get through the hard days, and that is why I love him so much.
We began fertility treatments with 12 physically painful IUI’s, two miscarriages, two rounds of IVF along with pills and shots that either gave me pounding headaches, emotional mood swings or hot flashes that drowned our sheets with my sweat. It was exhausting, both physically and mentally, but finally, after all we endured, we were blessed with our beautiful son. Pregnancy wasn’t easy either, but we were over-the-moon excited that we were finally able to get and stay pregnant. To us, it was the miracle we’d waited so long for.
Our little boy is seven months old now, and every day I thank God for his sweet little spirit in our home. I cry thankful tears that our prayers were answered. Even on the exhausting days, I am in awe of how grateful I am that I was able to have a baby. When I look into my son’s adorable blue eyes and the big smile he gives us in the morning when we get him out of his crib, my heart is full of gratitude. After enduring such obstacles, it has given me more appreciation than I would have had otherwise, and that in itself is a blessing I treasure.
If I had to, I would do no different. All the hard work and tears paid off and we became parents. There are no words to describe how grateful we are for the loving doctors and nurses who were so understanding, and for so many others who helped us get to our goal. There are always those who don’t understand, but for those who do, they strengthen you in ways you never thought possible and give you hope when you yourself think there is none.
For those who do not have such a happy ending as we did, and those that are still hoping and still trying, never give up on your dreams of becoming a parent, and never stop believing that that day will come. We all have different situations, but know that you are never alone. We understand and we cheer you on till you receive the little miracle you deserve.